Valentine's Day always feels cheap
Jacqueline Kharouf, Opinions Editor
Issue date: 2/12/08 Section: Perspectives
Last Valentine's Day, as my boyfriend of nearly eight months led me by the hand to the front door of his parent's house where his mother had prepared a delicious home-cooked meal, he promised he had made a special present for me. We headed down the stairs to his room and he told me to wait just outside. I nervously touched my hair, trying to smooth out my clothes and look nice, just for him, when finally he came back out. He held a white fabric rose, with the glue still showing and the edges of the "petals"-fabric curled like the shape of a newly blooming rose-frayed and badly cut, attached to a green painted stick which looked like the processed wood found at a hobby store. A bit of ribbon was tied near the flower and the entire contraption smelled, to my surprise, like it had been dowsed in cheap cologne. He handed it to me and said, just as sweetly as he could, "Happy Valentine's Day, Jacqueline."
I nearly fainted.
And it wasn't because it smelled (although, truthfully, it was so pungent it stunk up my room for three weeks afterward….yes, I actually kept it that long). The gift had been well-meant and it was touching that he made the effort to make a gift, but it was just so poorly constructed that any sort of feeling of "love" or "admiration" was lost in its cheap appearance and, frankly, tacky intention.
Sometimes, we like to think of Valentine's Day as a "day of love," an excuse to buy expensive gifts and to shower the people we love in things that try to signify-but often cheapen-how we really feel. Although my now ex-boyfriend took the cheap route, many other people (especially men disillusioned in the ways of "girls"….and oh, by the way, we prefer to be called "women"), may accomplish this same cheapened expression of appreciation with even the most expensive gifts. But really, Valentine's Day is, as we all know, a day designed to do one thing: sell cards.
So we (both men and women) don't need a day to celebrate love. We don't need to concoct scavenger hunts and make dinner plans or choose to see a movie that somehow makes finding the person of our dreams blissfully simple (oh those "romantic-farces," those "ditz-flicks"). We don't need to waste our money on the most expensive gifts and we don't need live entertainment while we eat at some "cozy," "romantic" restaurant (and no, in fact, not every woman finds fish "cute").
I nearly fainted.
And it wasn't because it smelled (although, truthfully, it was so pungent it stunk up my room for three weeks afterward….yes, I actually kept it that long). The gift had been well-meant and it was touching that he made the effort to make a gift, but it was just so poorly constructed that any sort of feeling of "love" or "admiration" was lost in its cheap appearance and, frankly, tacky intention.
Sometimes, we like to think of Valentine's Day as a "day of love," an excuse to buy expensive gifts and to shower the people we love in things that try to signify-but often cheapen-how we really feel. Although my now ex-boyfriend took the cheap route, many other people (especially men disillusioned in the ways of "girls"….and oh, by the way, we prefer to be called "women"), may accomplish this same cheapened expression of appreciation with even the most expensive gifts. But really, Valentine's Day is, as we all know, a day designed to do one thing: sell cards.
So we (both men and women) don't need a day to celebrate love. We don't need to concoct scavenger hunts and make dinner plans or choose to see a movie that somehow makes finding the person of our dreams blissfully simple (oh those "romantic-farces," those "ditz-flicks"). We don't need to waste our money on the most expensive gifts and we don't need live entertainment while we eat at some "cozy," "romantic" restaurant (and no, in fact, not every woman finds fish "cute").
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