Wallace honored as new Mr. Regis
After series of grueling contests, eight contestants finally tipped their hats to this year's victor
Jacqueline Kharouf, Spotlight Editor
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Working the spotlight and strutting their stuff across the cafeteria, this year's Mr. Regis contestants were certainly hot, if not a little self conscious. The eight contestants, senior Michael Uhrig, sophomore Holden Drew Bower, junior Matt Wallace, freshman John, junior Steven Linenberger, sophomore Tommy Sodoro, senior Joe Keppler, and freshman Marcus Trucco competed for the title and the belt in the swimsuit, talent, formal, and question competitions.
Dressed to the nines, or perhaps not dressed to the nines, the eight contestants started the show with a group dance, which featured plenty unnecessary shaking and dance moves your mom couldn't handle.
Much of the dancing and shaking continued in the talent portion of the competition, in which Uhrig sang to the slightly modified version of Beyonce's hit, "Regis, Can You Handle This?" Bower wowed, if not disgusted, with his exercise routine, set to "Call on Me," complete with back-up dancers and tight out-fits. Up next was Wallace, who sang and played his guitar in honor of all those students who, as he said, cheated from his tests and made his friendship to further their academic standings. Whether the crowd was sympathetic or just sorry, they were definitely supportive as Wallace struggled through. There was also the random slap with a piece of metal, performed by Trucco and assisted by Uhrig (who swung the metal). The dancing routine to watch out for had to be Sodoro's, who seemed nearly as flexible as Mr. Bean as he shuffled in a fold-up chair and jumped repeatedly. John switched it up, then, with some slam poetry. The lyrics were slammin' and actually pretty neat. The dancing returned, however, with Keppler's rendition of "Thriller," also with back up dancers and tight out-fits. Finally, perhaps the most original dance routine of them all, was Linenberger's encore performance of "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy." All in all, the talent portion was quite scintillating.
The contestants then moved on to the bathing suit competition. Between the speedos, the speedos, the trunks, and the cucumber, this competition was definitely in the water too long, as contestants showed their stuff not once, but twice, for a fuller effect.
Finally, the formal competition and question portion of the contest concluded the exhaustive pageant. The outfits for this portion were relatively tasteful and ridiculous. (Trucco's silk pajamas were, well, silky to say the least). The questions were amazing and deep. Uhrig's reply to the question: "Who let the dogs out, and be honest" however, had to be the most memorable: "I'm gonna say-world peace."
In the end, however, it seemed the least likely to win, took home the belt after all. This year's Mr. Regis was junior Matt Wallace, who, despite the confusion and the reverse order of announcing winners (which went third, first, then second), took the belt and his new title with a gracious bow. Michael Uhrig came in a close second, followed by Joe Keppler for third.